What would you do if someone said or did this to you?

"SALUTATIONS, GOOD SIR, PLEASE EXCUSE THE INTRUSION BUT WE COULD NOT GO WITHOUT ALERTING YOU THAT VIA FRIENDLY HEARSAY IT HAS SUBTLY COME TO OUR ATTENTION THAT YOUR PEERS ARE OF THE OPINION THAT YOU ARE ONE WHO ENJOYS A GOOD MEASURE OF GARRULOUSNESS, ERGO, AND AGAIN I PRAY YOU EXCUSE OUR PRESUMPTUOUSNESS, BUT WE HAVE TAKEN THE LIBERTY OF REPLACING YOUR AGGLOMERATION OF ORTED AUDIO COMPACT-DISCS WITH A GLOSSARY CONSISTING OF SYNONYMS AND GRAMMATICAL SYNTAXES FOR YOUR REFERENTIAL NEEDS AND/OR PLEASURE PERCHANCE AN EVENT REQUIRING PROLIX DIALOG SHOULD ARISE."